What are rituals?
As defined in the dictionary, a ritual is, “a series of actions or type of behavior regularly and invariably followed by someone.”
What is a cascade?
As defined in the dictionary, a cascade is, “a large number or amount of something occurring or arriving in rapid succession.”
Rituals will cascade one into another, into another, into another and so on. Eventually, these cascading rituals weave the tapestry of our lives.
How does one create rituals?
Rituals become an ingrained part of our daily existence gradually over long periods of time. And, one ritual leads into the development of another. Some of these happen without thinking while others are learned. For example, when people awaken, some will stretch and others will not. This is not generally something that had to be taught. Rather, it is something that simply developed from birth. Meanwhile, the act of brushing one’s hair is a learned ritual. It is not something that we would normally think of doing except having been taught from an early age to engage in it. Once taught, that ritual leads to a feeling of increased esteem, better bodily awareness, and health. There are many such examples.
Brushing one’s teeth is another such habit. Because our parents made these things a constant in our daily routines as we grew up, they now seem as though they happen without thought. They are, in fact, our daily rituals. As our daily rituals develop, they can lead us down a prosperous and healthy life arc or a disastrous one. Further, there are many different disciplines in which we develop rituals. Examples of disciplines would be interpersonal relationships, professional development, self-development, health, and education.
Many times, our parents did not have the same educational and health opportunities that are afforded to us today. This means that we may have been raised with less than stellar habits and our life arc reflects that dearth. These early life habits and, in some instances, traumas can be exceptionally hard to overcome. They add another layer of effort that is needed to reverse negative rituals and implement positive ones.
There’s fantastic news! With small changes comes big success! We can make some tiny tweaks in our daily rituals and habits that will then begin to build and cascade into other areas. All things are connected. Every area of our lives is connected to the other areas. Change one “cornerstone” habit, and you will wind up changing your life. It really is SO much easier than you think it is! And, it’s such an uplifting journey!
How does one change their rituals?
Please keep in mind that changing a ritual takes patience, dedication, and time. If you have suffered severe trauma, please enlist the help of a professional to guide you on the journey back to a state of wellbeing. Having said that, taking positive steps in the right direction is something anyone, at any stage of life, and with any history can do and be successful with. Let’s talk about how to do just that!
Changing rituals happens in exactly the same way that they were formed in the first place. The exception and key is the interruption portion of forming a new habit over an old or automatic one. Let’s take a look at a couple of very pervasive habits/rituals in our society. Children do not naturally run to the bathroom to brush their teeth when they rise and when it is bedtime. Their parents consistently interrupt their natural tendency to keep doing whatever it is that they are doing and have them brush their teeth. Over the course of time, those same children who never thought of brushing their teeth, now do it in what looks to be an automatic, natural way. Meanwhile, there are parents that were not consistent or children that were particularly stubbornly set against the activity. In many cases, these children never fully developed the ritual and will not exhibit the benefits from it. Now, these are blanket statements.
Of course, there are always exceptions to the rule; however, there is no exception to the rule that when an activity is engaged in for a long enough period of time and with consistency – it becomes “second nature.”
So, then, to develop new rituals one must “parent” oneself. Let’s say one wants to develop a ritual that will lead to better health. Let’s further conjecture that exercising has been studiously avoided to this point and maybe even a dreaded idea. As is the thought of giving up those nighttime snacks! Willpower only goes so far in these circumstances. This is why so many “diets” fail! How then is success attained if “gritting your teeth” and pushing through is not the way? Simple, really, fun and pleasure. Exercise may be a dreaded task, but is an evening stroll with a loved one? How about a game in the backyard? Or, going to play putt-putt? The point is to pick an activity that does not “feel” like exercise. Most people tend to enjoy a short stroll in the cool of the evening. It is an easy activity that requires no special equipment. And, it doesn’t have to be a speed walk. Just the act of moving the body, in any way, will produce positive results. One can easily carry on a conversation while engaging in this activity. That conversation can lead to any number of other ideas and breakthroughs in ALL areas of life. This can cascade into idea generation that will enrich every remote aspect of life. Further, as one becomes more and more acclimated to the movement, the ability to do it at a faster pace develops. Many times this will happen without the person even realizing that it is happening. Talking becomes easier while engaging in the activity because the body is growing stronger. The ability will begin to snowball. Before long, it has grown into something entirely different than what how it began.
Another way to interrupt the a ritual is to begin changing what we are taking in.
Changing the nighttime snack habit can, and often does, cascade from this change. One could set a reminder to head to bed 30 minutes earlier than usual. If there has been more activity in the day than usual, it very well may help the effort to sleep sooner rather than later. In this way, there is an interruption to the normal cycle of snacking. Another way to interrupt the snacking ritual is to begin changing what we are taking in. However, the change needs should be gradual. For example, if the routine is having popcorn at night while watching a movie or television, try making popcorn with half the amount of oil. Do that for a while until it becomes the new “normal.” Then half the amount of oil again and do that until it becomes easy. Keep repeating that process until the popcorn has no oil in it at all. Or, if the go-to is bagged popcorn, use a healthier version. Then move to popping it on the stove top or in a special container for microwaves. The point being to make it so that the amount of oil is controlled. Then follow the steps above. Once the way the popcorn is made has been mastered, then the amount can be mastered with the same application of gradually stepping it down.
So, to recap, the keystone habit of inactivity in the evening can be changed just slightly and in a fun way. This will then lead to better overall health, more interaction with the social circles, better idea generation and masterminding concepts, changes in nighttime restfulness, and even evening eating habits.
Naturally, all these fantastic side effects will then cascade into other actions that can lead to better and better situations. That whole, “one thing leads to another” situation.
How About You?
What are some rituals that you would like to change? What are some rituals that you have changed? How did you establish new rituals? What are your favorite rituals? We’d love to hear from you!
